In this second transcribed excerpt from "Keeping Love Alive", Armand DiMele, host of the popular "The Positive Mind" radio show, explains that we first must understand what happens when love dies in order to know how to keep love alive.
You know the relationship: a good relationship is like a sail on a sailboat. It’s like you got wind in the sail, two of you are going somewhere, it’s wonderful, you touch each other, you feel each other, you smell each other, you like each other. And then time, time does this thing. And time seems to, through familiarity, through whatever it is -- the seven year itch, whatever you want to call it. Time seems to rob the sailboat of its billows, you know? And it usually winds up, either one or the other person feeling turned off to the relationship in some way. Not turned off completely necessarily, just not turned on. It’s almost as if one person becomes the positive magnet and the other person becomes the negative magnet. It’s almost like there’s a vacuum on one side and there’s abundance on the other.
Sometimes both people lose it, you know, sometimes it happens with both people. In some relationships, relationships that are formed on the basis of only one person motivated towards the other person -- this is where it’s no mutuality, but some person falls in love with another and they search them out and they serve them, and they take care of them. The energy is all on one side. So the other side doesn’t really give any back, and so when love dies on the side of the person who is doing all of the motivating, well, then they both are dead because the other one was dead the whole time so that’s not the case I’m talking about. I’m talking about when two people have the passion, have the love, have the caring. They have it and then something starts to go wrong. And you don’t even know it’s going wrong but it goes wrong a little at a time and then eventually it’s sour.
Now, what we’ve learned it that there is enough chemistry to indicate that it’s a natural progression that after a certain number of years, love in effect dies. And that what you could do? It’s just like a natural course of things. But now people are living longer. So how do they live with each other? They live with each other like two partners. They live with each other like two people living in the same house. They have a little affection, they have some smiles, and they have a few laughs with each other. They’re less than roommates; they’re certainly not friends because there are things you don’t want to tell the other person you are living with because they may react to it. What’s it all about? And we’re trying to understand what happens when love dies?
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